I'm a girl who lives in a world that still objectifies the female body and I am sick of it. It's a beautiful and wonderful thing. It's fascinating how God created us and the joy of attraction. Unfortunately, the world always finds a way to twist and ruin something beautiful. A gift uncherished becomes corrupt. A woman desires to be beautiful and loved, but not just on the surface. I recently experienced the shallowness of the world and a pain that I can't even describe. I was wanted for my body...and nothing more.
I should be flattered that a man finds me attractive, but no matter how many times I think about it, it was not honoring or respectful. I go so much deeper than the surface level and if you aren't interested in that, then the physical attraction means nothing.
I am a firm believer in the concept of inner beauty. What's on the outside doesn't matter near as much as what's on the inside. I could be the most beautiful woman in the world but if my heart is nasty, then what's the point? If all you're after is my body, don't bother because there is much more to me that you can't handle! The physical should be a bonus, not the main attraction!
My personal standard of purity is a little intense, but very important to me. To attack and then disregard my wishes along those lines is a huge act of disrespect. It's rude and whether you agree or not, that's how I am choosing to live my life. I respect your choices whether I agree or not, but I'm not going to force you to live the same way as me.
I have never had someone be so forward with me before and, as shocked as I was, deep down I was wounded. This experience will also affect my trust level with every guy I meet. Are they attracted to the real (inside) me or do they just see a pretty face?
I sure hope that some day, one man will love the real me. He will treasure and respect me. He will be the one who gets the bonus. Until that day, I will look to God to be the one. He sees the depths of my heart and the deepest part of me and He loves me unconditionally. Even if no earthly man will understand, I know that my God is all that I need. His is the only love that I need and His is the only affirmation I seek!